009_SNIP
THE DEVILS PARSNIP
After two days of solid excavation, Jim Brown lay exhausted beneath the blazing Missisipi sun.
He had won the battle... finally.
He felt the warm earth against his neck, rolling over to survey once more that bounty which he had finally reaped. Beside him, matching him in both height, and girth was a 6 foot 2 inch parship.
He would surely compete in this years county fair vegetable festival, with the harvest of his dreams.
I'll put it in cold storage down at deverauxs butchers. Old Bill wont mind it, in fact he'll be all too delighted to hold this prize winnin parsnip for me.
With the help of his son (little Johnny Brown) he loaded the 'snip into the back of his pickup and made for town.
"Hey Pop, what was that noise, sounds like a growlin", Johnny said, as they sped toward town, a gurgling murmur coming form the back of the pickup.
"Nothin son, prob just ran over an armadillo or some such. Poor bastards probably still spinnin round the axel"
The entire town gathered to behold the spectacle, as Jim and young johnny rolled back into town. Bill and Old Jim carried the parsnip into the cold store on a stretcher amidst a fan fare of warbled gestures from the crowd.
"You think it will be safe here Bill?", asked little Johnny.
"I hardly think it's gonna up and leave kiddo", replied Bill, who shared a laugh with Old Jim, before staring intently at little Johnny.
"I bolt this door shut every day at 4, and furthermore this here cold store is nuclear proof, take a damned wreckin' ball to tear it down"...
Johnny and Jim, left thanking Bill for his good deed, and promising to meet on the morning of the vegetable fair in two weeks time.
"Come on Son , time to get you your first beer" said Jim excitedly, as he put his arm around little Johnny as they made their way to MacTucketts.
2 Weeks Later | The day before the county fair
A phone rang.
"Jim, It's Bill, Its Gone"
"whattaya mean its gone"
"I arrived at 5AM with my thursday trimmins, the winda of the shop was smashed, whats more the goddamned cold store door, was off its damned hinges, the parsnip is loose"
After two days of solid excavation, Jim Brown lay exhausted beneath the blazing Missisipi sun.
He had won the battle... finally.
He felt the warm earth against his neck, rolling over to survey once more that bounty which he had finally reaped. Beside him, matching him in both height, and girth was a 6 foot 2 inch parship.
He would surely compete in this years county fair vegetable festival, with the harvest of his dreams.
I'll put it in cold storage down at deverauxs butchers. Old Bill wont mind it, in fact he'll be all too delighted to hold this prize winnin parsnip for me.
With the help of his son (little Johnny Brown) he loaded the 'snip into the back of his pickup and made for town.
"Hey Pop, what was that noise, sounds like a growlin", Johnny said, as they sped toward town, a gurgling murmur coming form the back of the pickup.
"Nothin son, prob just ran over an armadillo or some such. Poor bastards probably still spinnin round the axel"
The entire town gathered to behold the spectacle, as Jim and young johnny rolled back into town. Bill and Old Jim carried the parsnip into the cold store on a stretcher amidst a fan fare of warbled gestures from the crowd.
"You think it will be safe here Bill?", asked little Johnny.
"I hardly think it's gonna up and leave kiddo", replied Bill, who shared a laugh with Old Jim, before staring intently at little Johnny.
"I bolt this door shut every day at 4, and furthermore this here cold store is nuclear proof, take a damned wreckin' ball to tear it down"...
Johnny and Jim, left thanking Bill for his good deed, and promising to meet on the morning of the vegetable fair in two weeks time.
"Come on Son , time to get you your first beer" said Jim excitedly, as he put his arm around little Johnny as they made their way to MacTucketts.
2 Weeks Later | The day before the county fair
A phone rang.
"Jim, It's Bill, Its Gone"
"whattaya mean its gone"
"I arrived at 5AM with my thursday trimmins, the winda of the shop was smashed, whats more the goddamned cold store door, was off its damned hinges, the parsnip is loose"
